snap judgments no, really, there are some comics you really should read

You Mean There’s MORE? – Preview Reviews for 2/21

Well folks, here we are: Civil War #7 eve.  Can you sleep?

In just a few hours (hopefully less if UPS shows up at the store on time), we'll have the start to the end of the Marvel tent event of the summer.  Just this issue... then Civil War: The Confession, Civil War: Battle Damage Report, all the books that had been delayed from the delay on Civil War #7-  oh!  And Civil War fallout, like the Civil War: the Initiative, the two new Avengers books, all the ripples and shockwaves from The Big Death (you know, the one Marvel is caring about as opposed to wrapping up Bill Foster in a tarp in chains...) bound ot echo for a few issues, guaranteeing us Civil War until World War Hulk starts up its engines.

I am Civil War'd out.

Anyways, on to those OTHER books that are coming out today...

Cable & Deadpool #37

Okay, weird turn of event:  Deadpool is planning to become a super hero (stay with me) by capturing the Rhino and turning him into the SRA.  But first, Deadpool wakes up in maybe a lab but definitely at three inches high.  Apparently he was drugged at a bar and exposed to good ol' Pym Particles.  Rhino winds up finding him and wackiness ensues.  Believe it or not, Deadpool kicks ass at three inches tall and it turns out to be a big ol' plot to make Deadpool seem more bad ass than the issue before where he took on the Taskmaster single handedly.  Don't get me wrong, I adore madcap kooky Deadpool, but this seems strange somehow.  Perhaps because the name 'CABLE' is on the cover of a book he didn't even appear in.  Or the fact that a few issues ago things were pretty heavy and deep what with Cable having his own country and fighting in the Civil War and there was this huge rift personal beliefs and whatnot.  Now, we're fighting some pretty lame villains in a pretty lame bar and the Rhino is pretty impressed by DP's 'Foot of Doom'.  I think this is what happens when you have a central character shipped off to an X-Men book.

Immortal Iron Fist #3

Someone send David Aja a cookie bouquet.  The art work in this issue is gorgeous, fluid and striking.  More ruminations on past Iron Fists, giving us that sense of history while the book goes dreamily through its plot, where HYDRA schemes and the old and our Iron Fists meet face to face.  Good stuff, nothing cataclysmic, but mysterious and cool.  Yeah.

Legion of Monsters: Werewolf by Night #1

Oh boy.  Greg Land art.  Two stories: one a sexy werewolf story full of hot chicks and tarot cards and Lorenzo Lamas in Renegade.  Are we expecting dark horror?  No, just a hip little story about the beast within.  The second story is a Monster of Frankenstein tale with no credit for the artist or writer on the interior.  But it's fantastic!  Skottie Young (a personal fav) is expertly colored in that way that makes people like Humberto Ramos seem like manuscript and the story itself is short, sweet and deeper than the lead-in.  Not a bad book if you dig Marvel's more Midnight-y Suns side.

The New Avengers: Illuminati #2

Yeah, THE New Avengers.  Was that even on the cover of the first book?  Because I'm going to state right now that the 'The' in the title is ruining everything about what I had hoped was going to be a fun 'A-Team' styled book with the big brains of the MU kicking ass and chewing bubble gum as available.  But this pushes that 'don't take it all too seriously' standard I was giving the mini because here, that cover?  ACTUALLY IN THE BOOK (though Namor is not carrying Xavier is in his arms- but wouldn't it be funny if that was the book's gimmick?  Ever issue the chair was lost or tipped over and someone always wound up carrying the crippled guy?  I digress.)  We begin after the first 'season' of Dan Slott's She-Hulk, where Shulkie gave Reed Richards the Power Gem Titania tried to take he out with.  With an off the cuff slam regarding the caliber of villainy She-Hulk tangles with from Tony, Mr. Fantastic explains that the Infinity Gems are very very dangerous and that every time someone gets their hands on all of them only trouble follows.  So why doesn't the Illuminati... GO GET ALL THE GEMS!  The rest of the crew puts on their best 'Have you gone MAD?' faces as Reed announces that well, he didn't wait for the go head and already has two more gems and the Infinity Gauntlet.
Now this is the point at which someone should have punched him.  Or mentally checked to see if it was a doppelganger or ... something because this is huge.  This is not forming Voltron or summoning Captain Planet here.  The Infinity Gauntlet has no been held by very sane individuals and yes, you can debate me on that.  But no, Reed takes them on a little 'weirdness' thanks to using the gauntlet with just the three, finds out where two other gems are and says that the last one will just show up if you've gotten the others.  So, Dr. Strange and Professor Xavier head back to the X-Mansion with Namor, who Reed put on Team B to keep him away from his stuff and by stuff I mean wife.  Doctor Strange and Xavier realize that the Mind Gem is the collective consciousness of the universe and do a little philosophical interpretation on that and Namor fights a big sea monster.  Meanwhile, Tony and Reed put Black Bolt in a tube and have him scream at a fixed point, where the pure power is strong enough to rip a hole in reality itself.  Reed gets Iron Man to reach into that hole and pull out the Reality Gem, which promptly shuts down his armor, disintegrates his arm and turn him to ash.  Reed freaks out, uses the Infinity Gauntlet after a suggestion from Black Bolt and does... something.  Reality is righted.
Everyone gets back together and I want to say that the Infinity Watch shows up and takes off with the gems, but no.  Reed experiences the lure of power and his own pride at actually accomplishing all this and it takes Uatu showing up to SHAME Reed for wanting to pull off such a lousy idea that gets him to take off the freakin' glove.  Each of the Illuminati get a gem for safe keeping and Xavier's eyeballing Reed pretty heavily there at the last panel.
Oh man.  This would have been such a cool idea a year and a half ago.

She-Hulk #16

So, She-Hulk goes to capture the Wendigo, which is silly because Wolverine's already hunting him because.. he just is.  With a rare bright move by SHIELD (really, these guys have been the Keystone Cops in nearly every other book!), they've set up a perimeter for the 'Superhero Conflict in Progress' and are waiting it all out.  During the fight, Shulkie takes a pretty bad wound to the gut and has a bit of an out of body experience as her 'Jen Walters' side shows up to quote Star Wars and tell herself that this whole SHIELD thing isn't as cool as her first premise for the book.  Odd, but personally appreciated.  Elizabeth Twoyoungmen shows up to try and cure the Wendigo curse, but SHIELD declines the offer preferring capture.  Which they do, thanks to a funny and gruesome Fastball Special from Jen and Wolverine.  Wolverine has his doubts about all of this and even more doubts about She-Hulk hitting on him after their team up, citing 'Juggernaut's sloppy seconds'.  Ouch.  Apparently, all of this is working towards some 'Project: Achilles' by SHIELD.  It sounds nefarious and deceitful, making me wonder:  when did SHIELD become the bad guys?

Silent War #2

Taking a stretch through the Inhuman's motivations from the point of view of Luna (who's now six years old!) watching the monarchy turn around her.  There's a war on, you know and we're reminded of that twice in the book as a way to excuse a lot of strong actions.  You'd think there'd be more negotiation going on, Black Bolt and Medusa going to see the Fantastic Four to talk this all out, maybe even Reed realizing that the Inhuman's advanced crystal technology shouldn't be given to unprepared humans... it just feels like the premise of the book would normally be handled without th use of a mini-series, maybe an issue or two.  Maybe I'm expecting my heroes to be a bit smarter.  Maybe I'm saying maybe a lot today.  Anyhow, the Inhumans try and get the Terrigen Crystals back, are deflected, and wind up somewhere distant and cold where the Sentry is told to meet them.  Continuing his streak of acting like a nerdy teenager, he talks at Black Bolt, swearing he totally understands his pain and instantly comparing himself to someone cooler in order to look cooler.  (I know, and I'm a big fan of the Sentry too; the guy should obviously be left to Paul Jenkins).  The Inhumans go home before SHIELD can start more active hostilities and Luna's big secret about her dad having Terrigen crystals is revealed, leading to another trip to see Quicksilver who's got the crystals embedded like buckshot in his chest.  Good ideas, a little shaky on the execution.

X-Men: First Class #6 (of

Skrulls!  Skrulls show up, impersonate the X-Men to do harm to them and wind up sympathizing with their targets instead, earning them a boot off the assignment and a trip home.  The X-Men ponder over the mysterious impersonations, fight a bug, pass out and miss the whole explanation.  Life goes on.  These have all been short, sweet little stories that are more fight and fun than anything deeper or character driven.  I continue to enjoy the book as much as one would enjoy a bag of Peanut M&Ms on a break, especially with Mini Marvels and Franklin Richards: Son of a Genius backups.  Make sure these guys are getting shelved in whatever kids section your local store has...

All You Need to Know: New Avengers #27

Hey, remember Echo?

Sure, we all do!  She's that really cool Native American chick who's deaf and was intro'd by David Mack and given this really interesting story about identity and overcoming your past and had some fantastic art and oh yeah, she's Ronin.  Ah well, it was a good idea while it lasted and at the end of her story in the New Avengers, 'Ronin' was left to keep track of the Japanese Underground.  It was as if Cap realized how bad an idea it was to have this very lithe and limber chick in a thick padded dude suit and said 'Wait, just... stay here, we'll come back, really.'

And they did this very issue!  .... eventually.  It take a 'Dear John' letter to Daredevil to remind them they put an agent out the Japan, only instead of a break-up, this a special email sent in the case of her enevitable death.  She rambles, just to make sure the readers caught up on what she's doing.  She explains the reason for the dude suit, which was an 'homage' to Daredevil the first hero who touched her life.  She gets a little smug over how well it worked to disguise who she was.  In a display similar to bickering parents, the Avengers are her friends when they invite her into the fold and Matt's friends when they abandon her out into the Japanese Underground.

Doing her enemies a disservice and making her job a bit of a joke,  Echo explains that the Japanese Underground consists of slick criminals looking to get high or get laid and a bunch of Paris Hilton types, arm candy airhead heiresses.  So, Echo decides to play the ditzy party girl by day, then dress up as a bad ass ninja dude by night.  Let me say that again:  she pretends to be a stupid woman by day to get info, then dresses up as a man to intimidate and kick ass on the info she gets.  Does that sound a little... odd to anyone else?  Anyways, since she knows martial arts and is in Japan, she's going to run into the Hand.

This brought about an interesting revelation at work:  one ninja is bad ass.  A bunch of ninjas is fodder.  So the old addage about 'strength in numbers' doesn't work for ninja-ry.

Ronin fights a lot of ninjas.  She fights Elektra and, unsurprisingly, loses.  Because Elektra loves irony, she kills Ronin with a sai through the stomach as Bullseye once killed her.  And maybe to follow through on that irony, Elektra takes her back to the Hand for the resurrection ceremony which suceeds just in time for, your friend and mine, BRAINWASHING!  I thought that was the scene for Hydra right now, but I guess the Hand need all the help they can get.  As they toss the brought-back-from-the-dead Echo into a deep dark hole to face some sort of really scary mystical blue thing, her email to Matt Murdock begs him not to suffer this very fate.  She wants to be... avenged.

Enter the splash page!  Yep, before the end of Civil War, here's the new guys busting out of the pages to fight ninjas.  Again.  Sadly, my fears are realized as Doctor Strange seems mostly there to wiggle his fingers and play designated driver, teleporting them in and out as Matt Murdock must have forwarded the email to the correct people.  There's banter as they fight the ninjas and Luke Cage kicks Elektra in the tuna fish for Matt (old times's sake I guess).  Spider-Man grabs Echo, still wonky from the resurrection and whatever brainwashing that took hold, and *poof* they're gone.  Elektra swears they won't leave Japan, making me wonder what would keep the SORCERER SUPREME from going back to his Sanctum Sanctorum.

Details, I suppose.  All in all, it feels like we've done this dance before and it wasn't all that thrilling the last time either.   Don't waste your money, this was merely filler as we all wait for Civil War #7 to show up.

YES – Reviews for 01/31

YES.

Finally, I can speak about the great and mighty preview book we got in the mail last Wednesday.  When I opened the UPS envelope and saw it, I held it aloft like the mighty Excalibur for my co-workers to bask in it's glory.  And lo, it was awesome.

But first:

Ms. Marvel Special One-Shot #1

Okay, real quick, all you need to know out of this issue is that AIM was actually trying to make more mutants like Wanda Maximoff (people who could change reality at whim) that would be under their control.  Because it tends to work out so well for everyone.  There was this little boy (probably a few of them, really) that could alter reality to whatever he was reading, making the story 'come to life' as the only life there was around.  Okay, easy enough: kid reads a sci-fi novel that Carol Danvers wrote about her time as Binary and she convinces the kid to change the story so that they can defeat her novel's antagonist.  It's something the kid has never done before as he's been 'trained' somewhat to read from a script to change things around him, but he tries hard, alters the story to his will to allow Ms. Marvel to become Binary for a second so that everything can go back to normal.  Well, as normal as it will ever be again now that this kid has unchecked reality warping powers thanks to Ms. Marvel's lesson in changing the ending of your own story.  Will we see this kid again?  Maybe not, but once again reality becomes more and more thin and stretched in the Marvel Universe.

Annihilation #6

YES.  Yes yes yes yes yes!  I can barely express how awesome this book is.  It's like Christmas and my birthday and Wrestlemania all in one.  All of you who had been hesitant to read this story for any reason?  If you've been reading Civil War because that's where Spider-Man is?  Please pick up back issues or, heck, wait for the trade if you're so inclined to get the best ending of a story arc I have read yet.  Heck, I'll go so far as to say Annihilation is the best event Marvel has pulled off in a long time.  Andy Schmidt and Daniel Ketchum have helped Keith Giffen give me everything I wanted in an epic cosmic scaled story, deftly drawn by Andrea DiVito, and I can only hope that Civil War is a tenth as good as this series.
First page, recap sets you up for everything that has gone down last issue and we are set for the wild ride that is the fury of Galactus.  Are there the vaunted 'Editor's Notes' so hotly debated on news boards?  Nope!  Not needed as the setup for this story is all over and done, no mid-show minis or tie-ins or extra information other than what has already been provided within this title to get in the way of our cosmic final battle.
And it is fantastic! Spreads of every shape and size, everything drawn and staged with all the weight of one of the heaviest hitter's in the Marvel Universe getting so angry, he makes the Hulk look like Katie Power.  The Silver Surfer is there to give us highlights as he heralds Galactus's rage which decimates Annihilus's forces from start to finish.  Ronan, seeing an opportunity, grabs Kree warriors like likes of which haven't been rallied like this since the days of Mar-Vell and reminds us all why they and the Skrulls wage real war.  As nothing but Annihilus is left, Nova, Phyla-Vell and Star-Lord are there on hand and the last of the Nova Corp stands to end Annihilus once and for all.  Captain America and Iron Man haven't done it like this because, at heart, they can't.  This kind of fight can only come from one is epically good and epically evil.  When Iron Man and Captain America throw tooth-flying punches, there's no one to root for; these are our heroes making terrible mistakes.  This, on the other hand, is Nova fighting for the safety of the universe and Annihilus fighting to stay alive and expand. It is ugly, it is brutal and with a telegraphed save from Phyla as an offer is made and the Quantum Bands choose another, the peril is no more.
Or is it?  Any story can defeat its villains and let the sunrise on another day, but it's the quality of the next day that really makes the effort stand out.  Let's face it, Annihilus had a lot of forces out there and there are some former heralds that want to go out and make sure they are wiped from the face of the cosmos.  The Surfer remains with Galactus, who's now hungrier than ever.  Annihilus's right hand man, Ravenous still lives and in the interest of ending the war, makes a treaty with the Kree Empire, splitting territory with Ronan and leaving both chomping at the bit to tear the other to pieces.  Drax has to look for something new to do, as what he was created for is over and his daughter is still on the arm of Phyla, who wants to try her hand at taking over Wendell's old job.  In the end, Richard Ryder has to find a new place for himself, has to find something that feels like home and, just once, has to say that 'We saved the universe', to see how it sounds.
And I really feel he did!  The pacing of the book, the stories told, the perspective we are given, I really feel that might was used for right and good was done, no matter how much story is still left out there.  It was a long fought and well won battle that they get to uphold like a Ms. America crown.  And sure, there's a lot to be done, but we've just proved through single minis and one major story that they are more than up or the job.  We have tested their mettle and found them worthy to be called heroes and I, for once, cannot wait to see what happens next.

Daredevil #93

What could possibly follow that?  Oh, well, how's about Brubaker's end cap on his first story arc?  In an interesting twist, we're given a recap page in the actual story as a blind and bedraggled Matt Murdock reflects on how he got to this point and lays out the main conundrum of last issue.  Knowing that Daredevil is an honorable man, Vanessa Fisk's offer still stands: give him back his regular status in his book (blind lawyer by day, vigilante by night, the works) if he springs the Kingpin out of jail so that their dance of death can continue.  Once her death is publicized and Foggy Nelson gets back in the game (the reunion may just bring a tear to your eye), you can see the honor in the matter.  She held up her end of the bargain, so Matt Murdock's forced to hold up his.  It's the right thing to do.  As the pieces fall into place in the book, Matt Murdock knows what he has to do and makes his way back to the jail to have himself a talk with Wilson Fisk.  A very human moment between them occurs, simply written but straight to the point.  Now, I'm not the biggest Daredevil fan and I haven't read a great deal, but Joe Quesada really likes the guy and now, thanks to Brubaker, I'm starting to see why.  In the end, the Kingpin has a really quiet moment of mourning and humanity before he's stripped of his US Citizenship and shipped off to Japan, Matt Murdock's life is looking up again as he realizes the ghost of Karen Page still haunts him and we get a shot of an unexpected surprise at the end.  Once again, I am horribly hooked on a book thanks to the writing stylings of Ed Brubaker.  Uncanny X-Men?  Well, he's 2 for 3.

Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter - Guilty Pleasures #4

I want to tuck this book inside another so people don't see me reading it.  I know Brett Booth can draw butcher men than this,  but there is just something so deflating about a 'threatening' man wearing a skinny bowtie.  Anita gets out of whatever vampire place she'd found herself in, we learn that the guy who wishes he were Prince is named 'Valentine' and he wears his Vega mask because Anita scarred him with holy water when he tried to kill her.  Sure, she'd be trying to kill him first at his house but we don't get to see that.  Instead we see them wrestle in the grass and her pull the equivalent of mace on a very physical attacker.  Oh, she also burned his house down with two other hunters, one of who is a totally 1337 deadly killer hitman guy who couldn't weigh more than 160 lbs.  Another long tall guy who's nothing but trouble at her doorstep as she gets to her apartment after her last harrowing three issues; they trade banter, she goes to sleep and we find out she likes stuffed penguins because you know, she's human and quirky that way.  It's to keep her humble and cute, you know.  After a dream of Jean-Claude that involves violence and a coffin of blood, her bestest friend is at the door step and is of course, completely understanding and big sisterly towards Anita and this crazy story.  They both were witty T shirts with clever slogans and toast morning coffee to one another in a way that is just this side shy of a Celestial Seasonings commercial ('What was the waiter's name?') and I swear, they'll be planning on getting down to the actual plot of this story which is hunting down a serial vampire killer.

X-Men #195

I think this is one of those books written for the trade as with each passing issue, I'm confused as to why things are so important and how a fight scene gets slapped in and why characters aren't there when they are on the cover...  Digging deep, I think there's a good idea in here: Rogue being a team leader isn't smart, but it is sassy and the book could use a little right now.  Mystique goes missing in a teleport from the Girl Sentinel (who I cannot seem to remember when she showed up.  Didn't all the Human Models get destroyed in Zero Tolerance, way back when?), so they continue the mission with an eye out to find her.  Fighting occurs because... well, because and we learn that Iceman's ice-form isn't ice, but crystal, continuing my theory that people don't understand how useful freezing water really is.  We meet the bad guy, who looks to have grafted Rogue's power onto himself and, in order to get a leg up on the villainy, Cable and Cannonball push Sabretooth out of their floating headquarters.  We hope he'll land and be very angry.

There was a Marvel Spotlight as well (more ads) and a Ghost Rider 'Finale' #93, an issue that wrapped up a series from way back when; sadly I did not get a chance to read it and I'm pretty sure I would have been confused as heck about whta it was supposed to be wrapping up.

But hey!  Today, you be the judge.

Happy Wednesday.

Short and Sassy – Reviews for 01/24

I wonder:  why don't we get the DC previews anymore?  And will this paltry list matter when I go to work tomorrow and find the last issue of Annihilation in the next set of Marvel Previews?  Can I just jump ahead a week?

Oh, also coming out today is Civil War: the Return with your favorite or just mine, the Sentry bringing back the one man who could stop him if he ever really truely lost it this time, he means it.  It seem like a dumb idea that is again the Sentry's fault, but it's also being written by Paul Jenkins... who wrote  the now infamous Civil War: Frontline.  Man, hard to call this one.

These books, a lot easier.

Avengers Next #5

First off, let me congratulate "Mercenary Molly" and her Editor's Note within this issue letting me know that some events relate to Last Planet Standing, the last big event in the M2 universe.  She's a brave and, apparently, mercenary soul.  Anyhow, the book winds up with no particular shockers, no tricks or switch ups as Loki's daughter looks to turn Earth into the New Asgard and her personal playground.  The Avengers do what needs to be done and fight the villain, screwing courage to the sticking point and coming out a little battered, a little bruised, but on the winning end.  Sure, looks like there still may be some squabbling amongst the members and they took on some questionable folk but, as America Dream says, they are all Avengers.  And that's what it's all about.

Doctor Strange: the Oath #4

After trying to take on an undefeatable monster, Doctor Strange watches as Wong and Night Nurse try and step into help, but wind up getting tangled up within the monster's grasp in the process.  Doc Strange pinches at the bridge of his nose and utters the utterly quotable phrase, "This is why I didn't join the Avengers."  Oh, irony.  He does defeat the monster of course, resorting to pistol violence he finds distasteful and everyone gets to see our opposing side.  Note I didn't say villain, as the guy actually presents a decent argument at the end of his monologing origin story ('Hey, Doc, you know your origin?  I was like three steps behind you!').  If the magic elixir that this little mini revolves around can really cure all illnesses, what kind of world would we live in if no one ever got sick?  It's an interesting moral complexity I'm sure will be answered in the next and sadly final issue where we'll also learn if Wong just really died or not.  Man, I wish this was an ongoing.

Heroes for Hire #6

Two stories in here:  on one side, we have a Jewish enforcer by the name of 'The Shadows' going to Heroes for Hire to look into a situation for him that he can't have his hands on.  Turns out this all leads to a possible trap/ unfortunate coincidence wherein Man-Ape, the Grim Reaper and some chick named 'Saboteur' who apparently are resorting to old school villainy by trying to threaten New York with a bomb.  Now, this would be a great storyline if Civil War wasn't going on and SHIELD in the way, but there's still another issue to find out how all this is going to resolve.  Now, the other plot is the Humbug going to help a little boy rescue his 'pet robot' from the Head Hunters.  And no, it's not the kid from Sentinel.  But he's grumpy and the kid's precocious, so I expect next issue their little subplot will be heartwarming to some extent.

Silent War #1

Some time between the end of Son of M and Civil War #4 comes Silent War, meaning that the events of this miniseries really won't have any big effect outside itself, as such events would have to be mentioned or mirrored in the books that are set after this mini is over.  Ah, well.  Gorgon and some of the kids from the Inhumans mini go and make a big huge statement at the raging metaphor that is a performance of the Tempest at some fancy theater.  Everything is going 'according to plan' (because letting Gorgon talk is a good idea) when the kid with plant powers pops people's heads off on live TV.  People are understandably upset.  The Fantastic Four show up and just make sure to kick ass before taking any real names.  They have a fight, the FF win and Gorgon and Co. are taken prisoner and a very evil scientist subjects Gorgon to the Terrigen Mists they stole as an experiment/torture device.  This leads to a very big and scary last page of a tricked out Gorgon-Beast.  Meanwhile back at Attilan, Black Bolt is wishy washy about what to do about all this and the Council is just as forced into taking a non-position.  Something else may be at work causing all this uncertainty, but while that's getting sorted out, the Statement Squad are going to be in for a world of hurt.  On a personal note, anything done with the Inhumans that does not jibe with Jenkins and Lee's phenomenal miniseries isn't going to fly right with me and considering this is the same guy who wrote X-Men: Colossus - Bloodlines and District X, my expectations are somewhere around my shoes.  Civil War is enough political problem for the Marvel Universe right now; it brings in Atlantis and Latveria and Wakanda as potential threats to the central plot.  Adding in the Inhumans seems kind of vestigial.

Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane #14

Six more glorious issues left!  Here, we are given one of the best examples of how high school games of telephone really work.  It's not just a few panels of people relaying information, it's a really cool way to look at the characters through their point of view on what exactly is the 'big secret' Peter Parker has.  Well, it looks like Gwen Stacy's got the news of Peter Parker's big secret before Mary Jane, who winds up crying in the locker room because he chance with Peter is nil.  Liz is pissed because her friend is hurt and winds up telling Harry about her ire and bemoaning the whole situation to Flash, both of whom let on to Peter that they are in the 'know'.  Flash gives Peter the ol' 'wink-wink' while Harry just seems a little worried about his ex.  Peter thinks Gwen's dropped the whole ball when she lets on that she might have told MJ she knew something desperately secret about him.  And the circle is complete.

Wolverine #50

Welcome the second coming of stories you already know.  Wolverine vs. Sabretooth, Logan confused about his past, the infamous Silver Fox story, it all comes back again like well worn friends.  Suffice it to say, Loeb does nothing exciting or thrilling about his first issue on this #50 milestone (well, #50 for this run of numbering).  First off, Wolverine has a confusing dream about were-people where a black wolf fights a sabertoothed furry person and even Logan has no idea what it means.  Though apparently, this metaphor is important and he's even given the horrendously violent reoccurring dream pet names.  He has this dream on the way to the X-Mansion, where to be perfectly honest, he really doesn't belong anymore.  He's a solo guy now an it just looks weird for him to be walking on by, like a high school kid visiting their old elementary school.  He shoves a claw through the lock and finds Rogue, who wonders why he didn't just knock.  Logan then finds Sabretooth and they get down to business.  Fighting ensues, with Victor Creed taunting Logan about how he remembers everything else about his life now except for the one crucial thing that this storyline revolves around.  Quick aside: how does Sabretooth know that Wolverine has his memories?  Was there a memo?  Did the X-Men tell him?  Anyhow, Logan recounts the Silver Fox story ( the short story being that Logan and Silver Fox were in true love when Sabretooth came in and murdered her.  Turns out that this whole scenario was an induced memory from Weapon X and Silver Fox was an agent for them.  Oh, Sabretooth killed her for reals this time and Logan was still rather weepy over the whole affair).  "Quod sum eris", Sabretooth tells Wolverine amidst kicking and punching, "I am what you will be".  Which actually is a great sentiment I could wax poetic on for quite some time, but it's set aside for the time being so that Logan can once again pop his claws through Sabretooth's head in a fade-to-black panel cliffhanger.  After this is a strange story about Wolverine's first appearance in Incredible Hulk #181.  Ed McGuinness  draws a big beefy fight while we get commentary about how ridiculous it all is by Logan's inner dialogue.  Then comes the strange part: the Hulk grabs Wolverine and we get a two-page splash of the Ultimate Hulk/Wolverine fight.  You know, the rather infamous shot of him being ripped in half?  Yeah, redrawn by Ed McGuinness and stuck into the story.  Fantastic picture?  Hells yes!  Bad timing? Oh yeah.  Because people are going to see that then come to the store and ask me about it.  And I'm going to have to tell them the sad sad story of how late the book that had that picture first is.  Ah well.  Wolverine seems to wake up after that shot and shrugs, blaming Canada and walks off into the snow.  A great start for a celebrated author on a mega-hit character?  Not really.  But thankfully, Jeph Loeb is still cool (even after Onslaught Reborn) and there's more issues to come.

X-Factor #15

Thanks for making me highly uncomfortable while reading my favorite book, Mr. David.  I just think my quota on the Merry Marvel Masochist Society is tapped out.  You see, Jamie Madrox decides to go collect his Agent of SHIELD dupe and winds up getting kidnapped by Hydra.  Everything was going fine until they hooked him up to the brainwashing treatment that has felled both Guido and Northstar.  Joy of joys, this puts Jamie in a precarious position in his head with his parents beating him to death and calling him a failure.  This leads to him beating himself up, spreading the mind control ju-ju thin enough for him to break free but not enough for the 'mind control' to be tossed off entirely.  Brainwashing: slowly replacing clones as plot device that need to be put to bed for a very long time.  Meanwhile, Siryn and M go to France and get caught up in an anti-mutant demonstration there.  Causing a disturbance as only two hot headed characters can, they do the right thing of turning themselves into the authorities and going along peaceably.  While waiting in jail and with the proper authorities knowing that M is the daughter of Ambassador and Wealthy Man Cartier St. Croix, they find out that their intervention and good behavior has done nothing positive and for this, M kills a man while waiting in her jail cell.  I miss Rictor and the great direction the last issue had.

Happy Wednesday, everyone.

Ring in the New Year – Reviews for 01/04

A teeny list this week, as I was completely put off by the continued holiday shipping schedule.  I guess this is what you get when you revolve your week around when the comics come in; until about a couple hours ago, I could have sworn this was Tuesday.
Anyhoo, on with the show!

Bullet Points #3

So, JMS took a look at Reed Richards, blackened out one of his eyes and declared "What a twist!".  He also continues to wax poetic about bullets, something I hope he either gets more original on or just stops in order to concentrate his story because it sure sounds like he's in love with his premise more than the results.  Steve Rogers Iron Man dies in Peter Parker Hulk rampage and Reed Richards is tapped by SHIELD after his cosmic ray jaunt into space crashes from sabotage, killing the rest of the 'family'.  This should have really had a What If? on the cove, considering how badly this is turning out for everyone in true Uatu recounting style.

Incredible Hulk #102

I really wish this could have been its own series.  The evil Emperor dies and I still don't have a sense of how momentums this all was; if it was its own series, they wouldn't have felt the need keep putting the Hulk in it and could have used a couple issue to flesh out just how 'ooh evil' he was instead of relying on supporting character accounts and general 'he killed a lot of people!' flashbacks.  It seems like every thing he threw at the Hulk eventually turned to his side which doesn't really give me a feeling for a strong dictatorship.  In any case, that arc is over as the Emperor is dead and the Hulk is primed to take his place, as he leapt into molten lava to swim so far into the planet that he can push the tectonic plates to save everyone.  Now, in Wolverine, being regenerated from his skeleton missed my bullcrap meter because of Humberto Ramos's cartoonish kinetic art style.  But the phenomenal artist on Hulk, Aaron Lopresti, does not get such an excuse as his artwork has been fairly detailed and realistic; so when can the Hulk survive a planet's semi-core and move tectonic plates?!  Must have been really angry.  Anyhow, he's now the new leader (thus the name, Planet Hulk) with an all new alien bride at his side and the Borg 'Spikes' allied to him.

Ms. Marvel #11

... Rogue's in the hospital?  Really?  She looks pretty good over in the X-Men.  But apparently Ms. Marvel remembered that she hated her guts despite that storyline having resolved itself long ago.  Ah, well, it's date time!  This issue mostly serves as how easy it is to get in a lip lock with Carol Danvers and how oh so hard it is to live a normal life when you're a superhero.  Having around guy called the Doomsday Man hasn't turned out too well for AIM and he's now out and looking to take revenge on Ms. Marvel, proving that Brian reed indeed did read most of the comics from the first Ms. Marvel series.  It's not what I'm looking for in a premiere Marvel superheroine, but it's not a 'bad' book per se.

newuniversal #2

Everyone get your thinking helmets on as this is the issue where Warren Ellis is going to explain everything.  It's think, it's dense and you'll need notes.  The word 'paradigm' will be used.  But trust me, it will be worth it.  As Justice tried to rationalize his new existence to himself ("I am dead and in hell.  So I can do anything.") to Spitfire's dust gathering project kicked into high gear the moment superpowers are detected.  I'm really thinking this just might e the next Annihilation for me, one of those under the radar books you wish everyone else was reading...

Spider-Man Power Pack #3

So, sue me, I love these.  Simple, funny, fun and a true to fun loving characters.  In a convenient way to get Mary Jane, Peter Parker and Power Pack in the same room, the Power kids get free passes to a fashion event thanks to the friendly neighborhood one after helping him out last issue.  Yeah, weird thing to get kids, but hey.  It gives them the right circumstances for some fashion designer to have run into Venom of all people- er, things, used science to use it's shapechanging properties for a new line of clothing and then of course, wackiness ensues as Venom possesses the models (hey, look MJ!) and they all fight.  Hokey?  Yes.  Funny?  You bet.  Strange tentacle shot with youngest Power girl? ... check.  And ew for me even going there.  But next issue promises a Venom in pigtails, which is pretty cute.  Also, the back up Mini Marvels Civil Wards parody by Chris Giarrusso is also worth every penny, despite my personal preference for Year One.

Uncanny X-Men #482

Starjammers!  Yay!  Action packed through and through, this is one of my favorite issues Brubaker's done so far as things get down to business.  The Starjammers set about catching everyone up on the Shi'ar coup, Alex catches Corsair up on Vulcan suddenly around (which makes him a hard drinkin' man I see).  And Lilandra catches me up on the fact she and Charles Xavier were married, as I had always thought being her 'consort' was more of a long distance relationship kind of thing.  Huh.  Anyway, fighting goes down (*sigh* and Rachel and Lorna talking about kissing), Darwin turns out to be pretty hardcore, cursing in what I assume is Shi'ar (because 'Chak'balaar' doesn't seem to mean anything, though Chak'Bazaar gets me a nifty grocery store) and recognizes D'ken back from the dead, or at least Vulcan standing behind him in support along with Deathbird.  In true X-Men fashion, the plot has gotten peculiar and complicated.  Brubaker might have the hang of this yet.

X-23: Target X #2

I was not supposed to like this book.  But Craig Kyle and Christopher Yost continue to knock it out of the park for me.  This issue shows us that a little girl in leg braces kicked enough ass as to remain on Captain America's grudge list or a few years (though really... I have no idea when this book is supposed to fit into continuity yet; I mean, Matt Murdock is there in a legal way, Captain America is around, it's dark room... I have no clue), thus this current interrogation.  Because no matter how cute her flashbacks are with her gal pal and infiltrated family, you just know she probably killed them all.  Or they were all killed and she was blame for it as the bad guys seem to be tailing her with the pheromone that kicks in her berserker rage.

As a final note, for those of us on the west coast, be kind to your local comic shop.  I fear the worst from Civil War #6.  I'm not saying anything, just... be gentle.
Happy Thursday.

Under the Year End Wire – Reviews for 12/28

Happy Holidays, everyone. Hope it was filled with lots of good cheer as these week's books really seem to be mixed bag of diamonds and coal. Let's take a look, but first I warn the faint of heart that this way there be spoilers for the next issue of Daredevil. Just the mastermind behind it all and a fascinating look at where the book could go soon. So, watch out, and skip the review if you don't want the answer! Forge ahead, True Believer!

Anita Blake Vampire Hunter: Guilty Pleasure #3

Ok, last issue, Anita was in a dungeon being threatened by rat people. King Rat Guy saves Anita last minute, but warns her that no, they are still dangerous. Chick gets saved an awful lot by noble male figures who are in fact, just a little wussy. Then Anita gets to meet the head vampire, who is a little girl. A super-duper powerful little girl who... can make your brain hurt. Or something. They still want Anita to help with the vampire murders (oh joy! plot?) and bring out a zombie to interrogate. Unsurprisingly, the guy zombie expert acts like a schoolyard bully and Anita is so much smarter as to tell the Master Vampire that the zombie's going to be of no use in the investigation. Then the Master Vampire and filly shirt man fight, causing Anita to flee with the botched zombie expert. They flee from the vamp's hideout to a circus where Prince seems to be looming nigh.
I do not get this book. I had that phase when I was in high school where you wanted to write fan fiction about super duper girl characters that all the boys liked and were very strong yet damsely in their distress and I grew out of that. Is this just a bad adaptation? And as much as I like the art, I think it might be hampering the book. When the Master Vampire (oh, god, don't get me started on the little girl cliché) attacks Anita so that she can get a sense of how 1337 she is, the narration text is pretty straightforward that this is some sanity threatening power here. But all we get is a delicate and spooky little girl floating above Anita who's crumpled on the floor, fingers to her temples, eyes big and mouth open. Put a Bill Sienkiewicz shot in there, sketch it up a bit, then I have the gravity of the situation. Brett Booth might be just too damn pretty.

Annihilation #5

And speaking of too damn pretty, hoo-AAH! The war continues in snippets and shots to get the basics to you (never ending battle that our heroes tend to be on the losing side for) as well as some incredibly character moments (how desperate do you have to be to have Blastaar on your side?). Moondragon yells at her dad for killing Thanos while he rails back at her that it's what he was created to do. It takes him about a panel or so to realize that Thanos was actually helping for a minute there, so Drax sets about picking up where he left off. He goes and frees Silver Surfer and after some 'just do what I tell you' dialogue... Galactus is freed. And hoo boy, they had to leave something for issue six and is it going to be fantastic! Just Galactus pulling off the machine bits from him and telling Annihilus to know fear... holy crap. But, because this is just too awesome (have to leave something for the last issue), we cut to what I always felt was the weak link in the series: Ronan. In a matter of pages, I finally get an understanding of him though. This was simply his chance to clean up the Kree Empire that had sold-out to the Annihilus Wave. After fighting his way to House Fieryo (the current ruling house of the Kree), they beg, argue, demand and grovel in the face of Ronan, their judge. They have sold out an entire people because they were weak and there is no mercy spared. Not even on the Supreme Intelligence which, correct me if I'm wrong, seems to have gotten less supreme and is more like a vegetable in a tank. With all the ruination in his path, how could the Kree Nation not chant his name while he steps out of a balcony? This is what I want out of mega events.

Civil War: Choosing Sides

Uhm, why was this in the Preview books? Because it has a new cover? Lame! Uhm, you've probably already read it, but if you were expecting new info on the Civil War, just go buy something else. It's the "Brave New World" one-shot for Marvel, a bunch of stories to try and get us to buy the new books they're pushing. There's a nice Venom story to get you into the Ellis Thunderbolts, a so-so Ant-Man story, USAgent headed to Canada for the new Omega Flight and a kind of funny Howard the Duck story. Enh.

Daredevil #92

Now, I'm going to warn you: the following is the culmination of Brubaker's run on Daredevil so far. I am about to tell you how brilliant this guy is and how amazingly this trap was set. If you don't want to know, just skip ahead.Still here? Good. Because at the head of this life-ruining montage that DD's been fighting his way through since they tossed him in prison is none other than Vanessa Fisk. Mrs. Fisk believes that for killing her son oh so many issues ago, she's going to die from an illness and has officially had it up to here with the Dance of Death between Daredevil and the Kingpin. No more Mrs. Nice Wife, she wants them to suffer through the lives that they have created for one another, locked in ugly and mortal combat. She offers Matt Murdock a chance at getting his life back under him, a veritable restart on his book where he would go back to his secret identity, his law office, his best friend, all of it. All he has to do is represent the Kingpin in court and get him cleared and out of prison. Of course, Matt eschews the idea and walks out but since the woman's got this whole thing planned for all this time, you think that he gets to say no so easily? An FBI director is killed with very faming evidence that Daredevil was the one to do it, slowly leading him back to her once more. Oh this is so good. I love arcs that wrap in on themselves and show you a brilliantly laid out plan towards a goal that... wouldn't be all that bad. I wouldn't mind a restart, back-to-basics approach on Daredevil again, but then again, I love the stories being told now...

Immortal Iron Fist #2

As of this issue, the Immortal Iron Fist is on my pull. I will pay hard earned money on this series and then, I'll buy the trade. Because, while borrowing a lot of elements from other titles that are doing well, there is nothing like this on the shelves. Iron Fist, in need of air, gets a hold of Power Man who takes him to the Night Nurse. Mark my words, folks. 2007 is the Year of the Night Nurse. The two old friends catch up, crack wise and find themselves in this new Civil Warian world. Danny Rand finds out that his eating bad Chinese food shtick does not give him street cred, that his girlfriend is using the Heroes for Hire name to work for The Man (can he sue? he might!) and that the Rand Corporation is in the first stages of a hostile takeover by Hydra. Oh! And someone else has the Iron Fist and is using it while having WWI era flashbacks and running from secret shadowy people. All of this is told in quickly-paced dialogue that's got a jokey tone to it at times and clever art that makes full use of the space and script. Go and read Iron Fist. You'll be pleasantly surprised.

Onslaught Reborn #2

I still have no idea why we're revisiting this, but here we are, knee deep in some pretty mind-wiping art and uninspired scripting. Come on, Loeb. My co-worker thinks you're like a god unto man. Why are you doing this? Mind you, if I was a 14-year old kid, I might think this is pretty "tight" (isn't that what the youngsters say today?) but when you're previous work includes Superman for All Seasons and Batman: the Long Halloween... why are we writing down? Franklin gets a rushed intro to the Avengers ( at least Cap, Iron Man and Thor apparently) who push Onslaught into a river or some sort of body of water and then send the kid off to the Fantastic Four, who proceed to remind Franklin that their not his parents and that he created them in a big event a long time back. Exposition happens and then Thor comes through a wall because a steamroller hit him. He goes back to fight the Hulk and gets controlled by Onslaught. Bam bam bam bam bam, plot punches you in the face through the entire book and no, it's not very elegant. With lines like "I can spare you or fillet you, it makes no difference." and "It's called 'The America Flag'. Folks have tried to burn it, spit on it... disrespect it." (for some reason, that line seems so sinister in my head) and the fact that Onslaught turns into a purple and red orangutan in the background on page 14, I have no idea what this book is doing here.

Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane #13

So, Gwen's new beau Peter is flighty, often comes up with lame excuses to ditch her and can seem to be anywhere on time. What's a girl to do? Why, go talk to his old pal, Mary Jane for answers. Mary Jane, who's acting distant and flighty herself to hide her secret crush on Peter. I mean, I can keep telling you I love this book until I'm blue in the face and you know, I don't even mind. It's fun, it's funny and has all the heart a Spidey book should have.

What If? X-Men: Age of Apocalypse

Attention, readers! THIS IS NOT THE AGE OF APOCALYPSE! The cover lies to you! The What If? involved is "What If Legion had Killed Both Xavier and Magneto?", effectively skipping a lot of stuff that made the original AoA cool, not to mention a lot of the characters who were involved who are now dead from an early mutant concentration camp system, leaving the resistance an odd bunch of joes including Captain America with Thor's hammer. Those who survived apparently went to the Savage Land and then Apocalypse shows up, when really seems kind of tacked on. The only really Age of A thing that sticks is Nate Grey, who grew up normally with Ma and Pa Summers in the Savage Land until he was a teen, which is when Apocalypse's forces got around to getting there. Nate Grey is grabbed by Sauron and sent to safety while the paradise that raise him in stomped to bits. Wolverine finds him in the snow and gets him into the Resistance. A lot of fighting to take down Apocalypse once and for all, yadda yadda, Apocalypse is found and gets a one-panel death. A lot of lead up and then one gooey panel and we're done... but not quite! You see, Nate Grey gets the brilliant idea that if he uses the Eye of Aggamotto and puts on Apocalypse's armor, he can go back and fix the past; Captain America thinks this is a dumb idea and fires a lighting bolt at him. The lightning bolt misses and hits the time portal Nate was going to use and yep, that lighting bolt goes through time and space to kill ALL the Xaviers and Magnetos in the multiverse. Yay What Ifs.

What If? X-Men: Deadly Genesis

If their intention was to get me to like Vulcan, they're still not doing it for me. Apparently, in "What If? the Retconned X-Men Team Had Lived?", Vulcan would become the, and I quote, "World's Greatest Superhero", a media darling and the leader of a whole slew of X-Men. Moira MacTaggart and Professor Xavier would have married, Magneto would have been defeated and that whole 'world that fears and hates them' would be non-existent. Oh, and he would have murdered the original team he went to save and hid the fact from everyone, including a deadbeat sculptor Scott. For his crimes, he's banished to space-bound Krakoa, stripped of his powers and forced to watch his crimes over and over in order to get something to eat. The end of the book leaves us with the idea that, eh, he'll get over it.

Wolverine: Origins #9

Wolverine trained Black Widow as a little girl. Man, does Logan have a thing for helping out little girls and teaching them to kick ass. We get mostly a big flashback to lil'Natasha and younger Logan escaping the Russian man who wrote the book on modern spy warfare and by the time the present returns, SHIELD is here to confuse things further. Man, and I was just starting to get into this book and here comes what feels like a rather random twist in an already dragging book.

X-Men #194

So, if you were a big blue furred person, would you wear a button-up shirt and tie? Wouldn't that be oppressively warm for someone already in a full suit of fur? Sure, a lab coat's kind of handy for keeping things in pockets and protecting you from splash damage, so to speak, but a collared shirt and bow tie? Beast just doesn't get a second thought these days, poor guy. Anyhow, Rogue and her team get very belligerent this issue in a tone that smacks of 'this isn't your daddy's X-Men anymore, kids!'. Mystique still has enough pull with the government to make Sentinel Squad ONE completely useless as the government might have a problem with registering super-heroes, but letting a team of unlicensed mutants in a floating headquarters is just fine. I mean, Mystique has pull you know. Cable hangs around, Sabretooth is Sir Not-Appearing-in-This-Book, and Sam doesn't like Scott's style of leading anymore. Oh, and my favorite: Lady Mastermind is only wearing that uniform because she only had a hospital nightie and Rogue allows her to. Mind you, I think the hospital nightie might have been a little more covering that the 'uniform' that Chris Bachalo drew, but she better earn those pasties! While Sabretooth (on the cover) isn't in the book, we do have Karima who is, in fact, an Omega Sentinel. That's new. And the mysterious 'Pan' (short for Pandemic) is shoehorned in as an old college of Xavier's and someone who tried to help Rogue when she first came to the Mansion. He also wants to reverse engineer a Typhoid Mary like condition in which... well, he'll be sick and the rest of us won't. Or he won't be the carrier of a disease and we all will be. Or that he wants to manufacture something like Rogue's powers. We hopefully will find out more detail next issue.

Remember: happy Thursday, folks.

All You Need to Know: New Avengers #26

Uhm, wow. That book went quick. This is going to be a short one. The good news? Alex Maleev's art does not disappoint. Everything looks sketchy and dreamy and gorgeous and is honestly the reason I paid my $3.22. Otherwise, the book is cotton candy: sweet and unsatisfying.

We start with Hawkeye waking up post-HoM outside the Avengers broken down mansion and setting up his infamous marker that we saw at the end of that series, with his costume and the arrow through the article about his death. Once that's finished, he does the perfectly smart thing and goes to see Doctor Strange. Because if you're really confused about your existence, hes the guy to see.

Spooky fingers are wiggled, the Eye of Aggamotto used and Clint is given a clean bill of resurrected health. Reasonably upset about Wanda killing him not once, but twice, he wants to go find her and shake her until answers come out. Doctor Strange advises against it, since really, what kind of answers is he expecting? It's just only going to get worse and it's not like anyone is going to take responsibility for a rather good idea rushed through the issues. After all, who would want to hear Wanda's side of things, isn't she just crazy?!

I digress.

Despite being Sorcerer Supreme, Doctor Strange says he can't find Wanda and doesn't seem at all keen on going to investigate a woman who single handedly warped the reality he's sort of in charge of by being Sorcerer Supreme, so Clint goes on a quest. First to Genosha, which we never see and then to Wundagore Mountain where he rescues a woman from having her purse snatched. As someone else helps the mystery woman to her feet, she rises to reveal herself as- A GHOST RIDER AD! I mean, Wanda! Clint swoons.

Waking up, he's been carried to Wanda's humble apartment where she warns him against waking up her Aunt Agatha in the next room. Going through a series of head-holding and seductive poses, we find out that she's made a new life out of thin air for herself and appears to have no memory of the whole debacle she caused. Lucky her. Clint, upset by the lack of closure and the fact that Disassembled and House of M still are pinned on just some chick going cuckoo (women! I tells ya...), makes everything better by having sex with an obviously lost and very hot Wanda. Waking up, he decides to give her a mysterious exit when he notes the door that holds dear ol' Aunt Agatha who isn't supposed to be bothered; of course, wants to take a peek. His hand on the knob, Clint remembers Strange warning him that he might not really want to know 'the Truth' by this point, I mean, really and so we're left with him heading out into the street.

Well, the book is gorgeous, but nothing is answered and nothing is gained. Wanda is still some dizzy dame and Hawkeye is left to just bum around the MU with no one knowing if he's alive or dead. Thanks, Bendis.

Next issue: Revolution!

Shorter, Snappier – Reviews for 12/13

Though I'd forget again?

Amazing Spider-Girl #3

Maybe it's my 80's upbringing, but having a central location for trouble be a women's shelter is kind of a throwback in this day and age.  Not saying battered and in need women aren't as important as they were when Jem was on, but I keep expecting Mrs. Garrett to show up and teach everyone a little something about ourselves.  More of a monster of the week issue as we catch a bit of peripheral story buzz from all the little subplots running through the book, some supporting characters catch screen time and we get an object lesson in force vs. compassion with villains.  I really do like May's story here and I can see why there is such a huge fan base for the little book that could.  They don't have nice futures in the Marvel Universe except here, where life isn't perfect for our hero, but she works hard to do what she can.  How can you not like a book like this?

Avengers Next #3

In a similar vein is good ol' Avengers Next, proving that the M2 universe is good for what ails you.  A character love triangle emerges, a fight happens and the villains take a twist at the end of the book that leaves you waiting for #4.  It's a lot easier sometimes to pick on a book that's doing something wrong, but when they don't swing for the fences or fail to give it up each issue in the Mighty Marvel Manner, there are only so many times you can say 'Good on ya, guys'.  But good on them anyways, goshdarnit!  In the days of radical change and out and out madness, there are still books you can literally take off the shelf, read and enjoy consistently.  Sure, it's not mind blowing or risk taking but isn't it nice once and awhile just to have it there?

Bullet Points #2

Man, does JMS love his work.  Enough to repeat it over and over, making a simple phrase seem like poetry... or pretentiousness.  You see, the issue starts off with the idea that bullets change 'space, time and flesh' and how really profound that is hen matched up with events.  Like say, the magic bullet theory (which I thought was pretty well disproven by this point).  The 'space, time and flesh' are repeated to drive the point home when Peter Parker 'Hulks out' and over Aunt May's inner turmoil of not having Uncle Ben to help raise him, which are honestly the weakest parts of the book.  As if the metaphor was supposed to help the reader think it was much better for the similarities to events that also may or may not have happened.  I can say the more time spent on Steve Rogers and Reed Richards that will keep me looking into the book as it comes out (because if Captain America never came to be, Tony Stark doesn't exist along with Rick Jones.... maybe Bruce Banner at this point too, anyone seen him?).  Next issue promises some Fantastic Four-age.

Ghost Rider #6

Richard Corben is stylish.  He's like the R. Crumb of horror for me. And this issue uses him wonderfully as we get more of Ghost Rider's background in between brutal moments of now.   Ol' Flamehead is still on the hunt for more bits of the Devil keeping with the main premise of the book while we catch moments of Blaze's life before he was really settled into the Vengeance business.  Considering how 'monster of the week' things could get as we look for a piece of the devil, fight him, kill him and move on, these vignettes keep things from stagnating and are done rather well.  And there's nothing like the Hell's Angels in Ghost Rider to make you look forward to next issue.

New X-Men #33

From the first page, my jaw dropped.  It's a O.N.E. report!  No way!  And they are actually talking about all the mistakes they've made regarding school safety (minus the bus thing)!  Leave it to New X-Men to remember what it did last week, let alone last year.  In fact, with an appearance by the Astonishing headmasters Scott Summers and Emma Frost, they also cover up the fact that kids wound up saving the universe from Nimrod a few issues ago and that wasn't even really needed, as the average reader is rather used to kids saving the world in lieu of adults.  But still, they tried and that's why I like this book.  Mind you, Dust's burqa keeps getting more form fitting and now sports a red sash, so I guess no one's perfect.  This is their tie in to X-23: Target X, so it's got X-23 having boy trouble, Mercury taking her into confidence at a coffee shop where Wolverette cuts herself under the table while mulling over her woes and then... explosions!

Wolverine #49

Wolverine is best when not taken seriously in large doses.  This is how i have come to get over my initial dislike of an overexposed character who's normally handled with an obnoxious level of invincibility.  I think Humberto Ramos is perfect for the Canuklehead, all the exaggeration and kinetic energy just what's needed to get across the ridiculousness of how far Logan can gone in recent storylines (I mean, I liked the book and all but... regenerating when he looks to be just a metal skeleton?).  This is a fill-in issue for the holiday season that turns out to get the point as well as give us a new one to make the reader count some blessings in the yuletide season.  Logan goes shopping for Kitty at a local mall and turns out to get mixed up in the kidnapping of a spoiled rich girl.  Now, keep in mind that the villain of this issue is just a dude, no powers, no super duper ninja squad, just a guy with a plan and it nearly works if it wasn't for the girl's loyal bodyguard and Logan's bad assery.

X-23: Target X #1

You know, this is better than I thought it was going to be.  Sure, I'm slowly learning to love the Logan, but X-23 is an obvious cash grab and continues the theme of Video Game style Chicks for Marvel, women who are girls and never wanted to be as effortlessly super bad ass and oh why does life have to be so hard?   Go read Spider-Woman: Origin for the best example of this trend, but back to the book at hand.  A chance to get some fill in for between  the first mini, NYX and New X-Men, it's written fairly well and gets its point across.  Someone should really thank Mike Choi and Sonia Oback personally, though, because without their stunning artwork I don't think it would have flown as well as it did.

X-Factor #14

The book makes a good point:  the new noir look really saps a lot of the humor the book had oh back in the day.  But you know, that's okay.  This isn't the same book, despite being the same writer and PAD will remind you of that just like he did on his return to the Incredible Hulk that got lost in the House of M.  While I'm not saying the book is (without its quips because really, what's a Peter David book without them?), it's just not as fun as the original run and it's not supposed to be.  For #14, we get Jamie walking about and working the beat as, with a little extra Samson time (and in an interesting twist as he plays the Val Cooper role from the original X-Factor shrink issue where the other characters are completely misjudged and there's even a kidnapping at the end) he decides to 'pull himself together' and collect rogue dupes.  Guido's guilt over killing a guy is given some closure, Monet and Theresa forgive each other if not Jamie and Shatterstar/Rictor fangirls everywhere will collectively squee over a sit down with Rictor and Jamie.  This is not an action book, it's a conversation book and when two characters get together to hash something out, it really does sing.

X-Men: Phoenix Warsong #4

Let me get this straight:  proving to me at least that Scott still calls Jean's name in bed, Emma gets more Marvel Girl treatment as she is cloned or eggs are taken from her ovaries by Weapon X to create a crop of Emma babies (take that Nate Grey and Madelyne Pryor!).  Five of these Emma-Babies make their way to Xavier's and we all know and love them as the Stepford Cuckoos.  Wacky hijinks ensue, two of them die and one of them winds up 'calling out' to the Phoenix Force; in distress and plot convenience, they go back to the World from the Morrison run (when will they learn that only Morrison can do Morrison?).  The rest of the Emma Babies (tell me you're not humming the Muppet Babies theme) are hooked into a very Evangelion looking device and it turns out that they are plugged into a machine that could potentially destroy all mutants.  TOO SLOW THERE GUYS!  With a lot of headache and standing around by various X-Men just waiting to do something, the Phoenix Force goes into the Emma Baby Machine and everyone goes ONNOES!  The book started out interesting and now it's just getting silly.

Happy Wednesday, everybody

We Got Yer Books – Reviews for 11/22

Light on the reviews this week, but still some fantastic books coming out from Marvel this week. Why don't we get DC First Look books anymore? And no, for the last time, Thanksgiving will not delay your books. At least not at Metro Entertainment!

And they pay me to say that!

Daredevil #91

By all accounts, this is a filler issue, a shorter step of confronting the girl and fighting her flunkies to a bigger punch of finding out who's behind all this. And the best part if it all is that I don't mind in the slightest. Instead of a book like Civil War, marching towards its apex, there's an almost dreamy quality to the book, getting you where you need to go while telling a few anecdotes along the way. We watch Daredevil do his best Batman, flinging himself off rooftops in that newspapery inking style that I've come to know and love from the book, colored in muted tones except for the red of his costume. Ah, Brubaker.

Heroes for Hire #4

Okay, the guys at the shop were really into this book at the start, finding it a nice little tie-in to Civil War. Odd, considering how much fluff (good fluff, mind you) the Daughters of the Dragon mini-series was, but I could see how it might be put as a lighter, get the job done kind of view it could have on the big tent event. So all that good work, all that buzz from Civil War... and we're back to mini-series material. They have these new and interesting characters, why not to go them for plot? Why crack open the OHtMU's and find some random villains or heroes to put under the Registration crunch? Ah well. Riccadonna is out and, to prove her major villainess status, sends hitmen after the H for H. Some are kind of stupid (Insecticide? Really?), some are kind of cool (Shang-Chi's stylish calm against his foe) and some play right into their clichés, down to the ninja. Our cliffhanger ending shows that Riccadonna now has superpowers. This should be exciting.

Marvel Spotlight: Ultimate Spider-Man - Bendis/Bagley

I stopped reading Wizard. The ads posing as articles got to me after awhile and I'll just flip through the store copy if I really need to. I also haven't bought any of these "Daily Bugle" mini-papers since the CSN is free; yeah, they want a quarter but it still boils down to ads. Then the X-Axis lets off some steam about Marvel's 24 pages of adverts to 22 pages of story ratio. So I took one look at the Marvel Spotlight and went on to the next book.

New Excalibur #13

The Wrecking Crew! YAY! These guys are still up and at it? That rules! Not to mention the fact that they're having a little private chat with reformed villain, Juggernaut. And by private chat, I mean pounding him into the pavement. I appreciate seeing a little retribution for switching sides, especially from the working class Wrecking Crew. Juggernaut's smashed with a car, the rest of Excalibur engages in a little light hearted fight with the Crew and Juggernaut makes a last minute smash in the nick of time. But that doesn't mean he still doesn't hear what I assume to be the little Cyttorak headvoice in his brain telling him that evil would be a lot more fun. He goes to see the only guy who'd really understand him and the guy he helped put in prison: Black Tom. They commiserate, have a bit of a Dr. Phil moment and Cain goes off to where it all began at the temple of the Cytorrak, where he will most likely fight ninjas.

Runaways #22

Widower boyfriend Chase continues not to take the death of Gertie well at all and resorts to angry teen coping tactics. Victor and Nico talk about it and continue their awkward "romance" and in the middle of all this is an honest and simple "The More You Know" segment with Xavin the Skrull and Molly about tolerance. Now, I grew up in the '80s so I am more than familiar with embedding little public service announcements in the middle of your comics, but this sounded more like a conversation than any of them had before. Molly's little retort of having a picture of Northstar on her wall and everything was pretty cute and reminds me again what an opportunity Marvel missed with Northstar's current predicament. The Gibborim, their evil parent's benefactors, offers getting Gertie back for good in exchange for a "flawless crime" of an innocent soul sacrifice. Like any good D&D player, Chase goes over all the details and promises to return with an answer that just might be Nico on the chopping block.

Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane #12

And another chapter in awesome teenage drama unfolds. Don't tell me there are no comics out there for kids. This one is a done-in-one character study on MJ and Harry being flirts. I like that use of 'flirt'; it sounds fun and young and cute, doesn't it? A hard hitting school reporter wants the inside scoop on Mary Jane (who's starting to buckle under the weight of being 'plastic', as she puts it) and Harry the playah. Both have their reasons and a lot of it deals with self-confidence, more of the personalities that we know and love from our classic characters are coming to the fore and one can see how these guys grow up into the Spider-Man mythology. Also, do note: This is Issue 12! Yay Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane! And yay for Sean McKeever, the man who writes the little book that could.

Wolverine #48

Hrm. Can't find my notes on this one, so... what do I remember about the issue? For one, it looks into a little something people don't like to think about and for good reason. Wouldn't it really hurt to regenerate some of the grievous wounds we've seen Wolvie take very the years? As a matter of fact, it does! In some stunning artwork from Humberto Ramos, we get a little look at what Logan's thinking about when he's regrowing a limb or reknitting his nervous system. Sure, it's a little hokey and don't dare think about the logistics of regenerating your entire body over your skeleton, but enjoy the flashbacks, the noirish writing, and the cheep Atlantian roll in the hay. Also, Nitro is dead and/or in the hands of Namor; the preview copy might have been missing a page or two.

X-Factor #13

And this... this is going to take a full post tomorrow. You see, X-Factor #87 is to this day one of my favorite comics of all time. Everything, from the characters to the writing to the artwork to the coloring, it's my "gold standard" by which a lot of comics are judged in my book. I have HUGE expectations for a book that's the sequel and, well... watch for a full post tomorrow.

All You Need to Know: New Avengers #25

Civil War continues to bum me out, making going through the books a little harder these days as I see the finish line ahead in February and it's starting to look more and more like the light to an oncoming train.  But another month has gone by, bringing us another look at your favorite anthology series about a bunch of marketable heroes, the "New" Avengers. Wait. That should be New "Avengers" as I haven't really seen these guys do much as a team really besides hit ninjas. (SPOILER: In February? They'll be fighting ninjas again.)

But I think I figured it out.

Since starting up this upkeep, I'm pretty sure I have liked every THIRD issue of New Avengers. The Xorn Mess, the luke-warm Captain America, then the surprisingly solid Luke Cage issue. Back to the Spider-Woman Debacle, the Sentry letdown (god, what was that issue supposed to be about anyway?), and now some peace with of all people: Iron Man.

Issue stars out cheezily enough, some guy breaking into Stark Tower via ambiguous handheld device. I know it woud take too long to really show how hard it is to break into one of the most technologically secure buildings in the nation (even when it's not being monitored by SHIELD agents in powered armor), but couldn't we get something better than a Palm Pilot?

Jarvis has his back turned to the huge monitoring center at just the wrong time to miss this guy (and can we decide if Jarvis is skinny or chunky style?  Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man had him rather thick in the middle while this issue he's apparently gone on a severe weight loss program).  But when they both enter the same room, Jarvis lunges for the security alarm, and guy lunges for his gun and fires. Jarvis is religated to lying down on the floor, shot somewhere ambiguous for the rest of the issue. Guy shuts down the alarm system as Iron Man shows up wondering what in tarnation is going on here. Guy responds with "Cincula Tempest Mupon" and the armor locks up, Shellhead falling to the floor with a 'Toom'. My Google Fu turns up nothing for the special code, but I do note it's fun to say outloud. Especially Mupon. Mupon!

Anyhow, who is this guy who's taken down Stark Tower, SHIELD agents, Jarvis and Iron Man in six pages? Why, it's Kenny! Kenny, who knows Jim Rhodes apparently. And Kenny, who worked for Tony Stark at some point and is starting to feel a bit of the fanboy's plight.  You see, he can't stand to see the work he did for Stark being used to fight Captain America, given to SHIELD to incarcerate superheroes and to see someone he looked up to and believed going against the very ideals that Kenny looked up to Tony for in the first place. You see, he's here to end this "war" by basically reversing the matter of the entire Stark Tower so that he, Iron Man and the rather unfortunate addition of "the butler dude" (who is fairly old, still shot and bleeding out on the floor) would simply cease to exist in a controlled implosion. Then there would be no sides, as he sees it, and the war would be over and people could get on with their lives.

Man, I was so rooting for this guy. Every single one of the issues brought up against Iron Man and his actions thus far had no rebuttal. The fact that Iron Man has barely left his suit since the War began, suggesting some need to separate himself from what he's doing in order to rationalize it all.   The recent Giant Sized Hulk also had a similar theme of supporting characters wondering what in the world their heroes are doing anymore.  I know the feeling.  I've always felt that Marvel comics have always been the most, for lackof a better term, relatable.  I could be one of these guys under the same random circumstances and right now, I could really feel for this Kenny guy. Tony Stark picks him out of college and tells him the world was his, helps put his mind to this noble cause of helping people through heroism, being able to look at the TV or in the sky and see Iron Man go by and know that you helped put him there.  Feeling safe with those you honestly look up to.
Too bad he was this issue's villain.

Shooting Jarvis and letting him just sort of bleed there while you rant and rail against ol' Shellhead doesn't make you look all that good, no matter where you heart is on this whole thing.   Maria Hill, still needing some reader sympathy, finds out Tony's in dire straits, puts on a bunch of SHIELD gear (perhaps some even invented by Kenny.  IRONY!) and get there in the nick of time to shoot Kenny, stop his matter reversal processor and then it's SHIELD to the rescue!  Let's hear it for the best job SHIELD's done in nearly four months!  YAY!  Oh yeah, other Avengers show up in a last minute sort of way (just a panel with Ms. Marvel and the Sentry flying in after SHIELD, good job team!).

Maria and Iron Man hang out on the rooftop, talking about how underqualified she is for this job.  Now, I could understand the whole "Not Nick Fury" syndrome; man's got HUGE shoes to fill and people treating you like crap because you're not the second coming of the man who made the organization what it is today sucks, but it's understandable.  Especially when he's running around in other books still, Life Model Decoy or not, but that's a rant for another time.  Agent Hill says there are actually 75 people more qualified than her.  I'm almost offended that she's apparently that bad, my knee jerking in the direction of the implications that women can't run SHIELD.

But no, there's a reason why Agent Hill was given one of the most powerful positions in the nation, and it has to do with the movie A Few Good Men.  At least that's what she thinks and this leads her to believe that Iron Man... why, he'd make the best SHIELD director of them all.

So, all you need to know?  Yes, Iron Man's role in the Civil War has been pretty messed up.  People are upset with him and bring up valid points about his actions.  They get shot, adding 'shooting innocent people' right next to 'killing children' in the book of How To Tell the Reader You're Serious.  Iron Man, not defending himself against rather valid and aggravated complaints, says all of 17 total word balloons in a book that's supposed to focus on how he is handling the war.  He might take over SHIELD because it would "piss off all the right people".

Yep, Agent Hill, you're right.

Next issue: HAWKEYE!