snap judgments

no, really, there are some comics you really should read

Archive for the "net" Category


SOMEONE WARN THE SENTRY!!!

from Reuters

The team at the University of Minnesota said the void is nearly a billion light-years across and they have no idea why it is there.

“Not only has no one ever found a void this big, but we never even expected to find one this size,” said astronomy professor Lawrence Rudnick.

Writing in the Astrophysical Journal, Rudnick and colleagues Shea Brown and Liliya Williams said they were examining a cold spot using the Wilkinson Microwave Anisotropy Probe satellite, and found the giant hole.

“We already knew there was something different about this spot in the sky,” Rudnick said. The region stood out as being colder in a survey of the Cosmic Microwave Background — the faint radio buzz left over from the Big Bang that gave birth to the Universe.

“What we’ve found is not normal, based on either observational studies or on computer simulations of the large-scale evolution of the Universe,” Williams said in a statement.

The astronomers said the region even appeared to lack dark matter, which cannot be seen directly but is usually detected by measuring gravitational forces.

Oh, who am I kidding?  He’s probably still on the couch.

You Can’t Keep a Good Man Down

Now, awhile ago, mightygodking of livejournal fame, one of the fine internet denizens who helped me get through the Civil War, was kicked off the online journaling system I’d come to enjoy him on for being what they called a “serial copyright offender”.  He explains the situation here and personally, I’d just make a little banner letting people know that you’re on his side.  These days, the place I get my Doctor Who Macros is becoming a political statement about free speech,  justice, assisted suicide and all sorts of things I really didn’t sign up for.  Sure, this might make me “intellectually dishonest” or someone simply ignoring the problem or a number of things that don’t make me a part of the solution, but at least I’m not part of the problem?

Anyways, you cannot stiffle a god king, mighty or not, so he’s got a new place to hang his very valid reasons why he should write the Legion of Super-Heroes.  The man does some great work, spectacularly clever and funny and a joy to behold with little cherubs singing, so I proudly add him to my blogroll and suggest taking a look at his stuff.

Your Ongoing Soap Opera

In a rare turn of phrase, getting aggressive with the Pro-Reg side tends to make their position make more sense.

Judgment of Snappage!

So, Atomic Comics had this little news thing on Dark Knight casting and how Anthony Michael Hall has been “sworn to secrecy” over his role in the upcoming movie.  Now, thanks to how freakin’ AWESOME the ibelieveinharveydenttoo.com campaign was, I feel moved to start the guessing game.

Remember folks:  this is the way to incite your audience.  By making them think. 

According to the Atomic Comics article, Mr. Hall says that his scenes will be filmed in August with Morgan Freeman “implying his role will have more to do with the business side of Bruce Wayne’s life than the jumping-around-dark-alleys part.”  Makes sense, I mean, they’re going to have the Joker and the start or at least the tip of the iceberg of Two-Face.  But that doesn’t mean we’re not looking at a villain here.  My early nomination goes to:

 The Riddler.

Blogging Oughta Be Fun!

…and it always is, sir.  Thanks Bully, for keeping it real and plush.

Keep Hope Alive!

FREE JOHN CONSTANTINE

They Shoot MJs, Don’t They?

Alright, it’s late and I’ve hemmed and hawed over even saying anything, because sometimes, it’s just better to agree to disagree, but after reading a bunch of different articles and commentaries, I think I need some help.  I come to you, dear reader with a question:

Marvel MJ Maquette Sketch - Art by Adam Hughes

Why does this not upset me?  Why do I even think it’s kind of cute?  Am I supporting the wrong image of women in comics?  I mean, look at her!  She’s overly sexualized, doing Spider-Man’s laundry, barefoot to boot… it’s like it’s screaming at me to be outraged.

I just can’t do it, though.  All the tools are there, but none of the vigor.  I know this opinion is wrong because this particular maquette has become the subject of quite some anger on these here tubes.   Don’t get me wrong: I hate Star Sapphire’s new look as much as anyone and think the Wedding of T’Challa and Ororo did nothing but stick Storm in as sidekick in the Black Panther book.  I like to think I have a firm grasp of what is and isn’t right when it comes to depictions of women in comics.

But look at that pic!  It’s… cute.  Cheeky.  Even a little sly.  Like an old pin-up Petty girl from the 50′s-60′s, which Adam Hughes is so good at capturing.  There’s no overt nudity, MJ looks well fed and healthy, and her expression looks a little smarter than the guys who’ll be drooling over the shot.  I have more of a problem with Paris Hilton rubbing herself against a car in an ugly bathing suit while eating a hamburger than I do this picture.

Don’t get me wrong and please, oh comic-fen, don’t be angry with me.  I’m honestly asking for help here; tell me what is so offensive here and I will read every single word.  All I ask in return is that you listen to what I say in return.  I want to be convinced and I want to join the cause, my rhythm’s just all out of whack.

This Comic Is Not Yet Rated

For the past two weeks, Joe Quesada has been trying to answer a particular reader question and … well, bless his heart, he’s failing every time. Now, as a conscientious retail monkey, I humbly admit that, well, I’m a little more in the trenches than the ol’ EIC. I have parents coming in and wringing their hands in worry about what kind of pictures and words their children are reading (or not reading as the case may be). At Metro, we bag for content and have clear labels on the books that have graphic violence or sexual content. So when the subject of what’s appropriate for the viewing public comes up, I try to have an answer.

Last week, Joe Q got asked this question:

Q: Jimski 04-27-2007 12:09 PM

I have a question that has driven me bug-nutty for a year now. Whenever a question is asked about the possibility of Wolverine or Spider-Man appearing in a MAX book, the answer is always the same: the “name” characters are “like crack for kids” and we don’t want to put them in a story that would be inappropriate or damaging to young minds. If Jessica Jones wants to meet Spidey, Alias has to become The Pulse.

What, then, is the deal with Marvel Zombies – page after page of “name” heroes’ animated corpses with flesh rotting off of their exposed bones, tearing into people with their teeth? Did I really see a statue of Spider-Zombie holding the body of his wife with a huge gash in her neck?? I’m a grown man, and that’s profoundly disturbing. What’s the official explanation for this apparent contradiction?

Okay, let’s look at the question honestly for a moment: what Jimski is saying is that Marvel has a double standard for using its characters in ‘mature’ situations. That in order to get a Spider-Man appearance in a MAX book, the book in question has to be taken down from a mature audiences level to at least a T+ rating I’m assuming. It’s why the Punisher has two titles right now, one for Garth Ennis-ness and one for more ‘mainstream’ audiences.

Taken at face value, this isn’t anything new. Movies are rated as R on almost a purely commercial basis as there is little to no promotion or advertizing for NC-17 rated films. If Marvel wants to use Spider-Man as a marketing juggernaut that he is, he’s got to be strictly for “All Ages” as much as an R rated film. Sadly, there’s no real ‘standard’ for rating films and with no Comic Code Authority (as outdated as it was), comics are given the task of rating themselves. Let’s take a look at how they tell us they’re doing this:

:

MARVEL RATING SYSTEM

* ALL AGES
Appropriate for readers of all ages.

* T+
9+ years old Appropriate for most readers, parents are advised they may want to read before or with younger children.

* PARENTAL ADVISORY
15+ years old Similar to T+ Suggested for Teen and Up, but featuring more mature themes and/or more graphic imagery. Recommended for teen and adult readers.

* MAX: EXPLICIT CONTENT
18+ years old Most Mature Readers books will fall under the MAX Comics banner, (created specifically for mature content titles) MAX and Mature-themed titles will continue to be designed to appear distinct from mainline Marvel titles, with the “MAX: Explicit Content” label very prominently displayed on the cover. MAX titles will NOT be sold on the newsstand, and they will NOT be marketed to younger readers.

Marvel ratings serve as general guidelines for readers. In many instances, a PSR title may be appropriate for most age groups. Marvel leaves the final determination of what is appropriate content up to the consumer.

This is their current rating standard; it’s had to change since they decided to implement it due to copyright issues on the actual movie rating system, or so I heard. Anyways, these are as stated ‘guidelines’, obviously nothing in concrete here and if you’re doing this as a way to assure the consumer of the viablity of your product, this is the way it has got to be. Notice how ‘Parental Advisory’ and ‘Max: Explicit Content’ are very similar to R and NC-17? Joe Quesada, whether he’ll admit it or not, sees the comic industry like the movie industry and tends to treat books accordingly. You’ll never see a Max book on the newsstands, they tell you and thus, you won’t see Spider-Man in a Max book.

Now, the flip side of this and the second part of Jimski’s question is how Marvel can have this standard and yet print a book with all their selling point characer logos as detailed rotting corpses that are slaughtering innocents and eating human flesh. Spider-Man won’t swear or be seen next to someone who swears, but having him holding the dead body of his wife that he’s eaten part of is okay. Well, that’s also very true of the movie industry and popular culture as a whole. The difference between a R rating and an NC-17 rating and the people who make that decision was the subject of an entire movie, This Film is Not Yet Rated; the film talked a little about how there frankly is no real standard as to how movies are rated and that a lot of it is conjecture based on more variables that what’s actually shown on the screen.

With all of this in mind all of the very violent and gory Marvel Zombies books are a rated ‘PARENTAL ADVISORY’, about an ‘R’ rating. In comparison, the 2004 remake of Dawn of the Dead (a movie that scared the crap out of me) was rated R for ‘pervasive strong horror violence and gore, language and sexuality’. These two seem to even out.

Is it fair? No. Is it the way things are? Pretty much, until someone takes a stand and makes a decent rating system or enough letters come in that Marvel is forced to take action on consumer’s wants and whims. While the sight of an undead half eaten bride is pretty freaky, it can still fall under ‘cartoon violence’ as it is a stylized drawing and not an actual person. And while Peter Parker is perfectly within his rights to cuss from time to time, he still has to be accessible to all audiences, even the linguistically uptight ones. It’s not ‘for the children’, it’s for the cash.

Now, Joe Quesada cannot possibly say everything I just said, even if I’m Righty McRighterson here and not just a highly opinionated fan. There’s just something about coming out and admitting you’re in it for the money. But there’s that and then there’s not even trying. Joe Quesada’s first attempt at the question was this:

JQ: Jimski, in my world, there’s a big difference between a monster movie and a movie in which characters get to say #@$% and $#!@ and we get to see lots naughty, naked bits and stuff.

Same thing in a comic book.

Okay, now I’ll give the guy a break considering that week’s Joe Fridays started with him overworked and running low. But come on. That isn’t even an answer! That’s just a very general comparison. Some monster movies have partial nudity and swearing and are still <a href=”http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120877/” target=”_blank”>rated R</a> (sorry, first example that came to mind; think of your own here!). Apparently, things are just that simple in Joe Quesada’s world.

This last Joe Friday, someone stepped up again, hoping for a more detailed answer:

Q: KingMattress 05-07-2007 01:47 AM

Joe, I’m confused by something. Last week, a reader asked about why big name heroes like Spidey can’t appear in MAX books, but Marvel Zombies, with all its carnage, is fine. Your response was fair, in that a monster movie is different than one with curses and “naughty bits.” But isn’t an R-Rated movie an R-Rated movie, no matter the content? Do you feel that violence in comics isn’t as big of an issue as sex and language? I know comics have always incorporated violence to some degree, but far different than a hero eating a civilian’s head.

Along those lines, how is Marvel Zombies not MAX to begin with?

Again, clearly stated, passive in it’s accusation and very reasonable. Why isn’t Marvel Zombies a MAX title?

The short answer is because is Spidey’s going to be in this book, it better be on the newsstands. Also, this is still in the realm of cartoon violence and that the Parental Advisory ranks the book within R rating guidelines, and MAX titles have two extra points (swearing and nudity) to knock them into the MAX category.

Let’s see what a more rested and clear headed Joe Quesada has to say:

JQ: Okay, one more time, with extra clarification.

KingMattress , first let me say that here in America, violence is much more acceptable than sexual issues. I don’t necessarily agree with that, but that is the world we live in whereas in places like Europe, the exact opposite is true.

Now let’s look at modern comics and content, if we can. When we look at our old Marvels from the 60s, the content may seem sweet and wholesome and in some cases quaint to us today, but in its time it was considered very edgy and perhaps even a bit much for little kids. That really hasn’t changed much forty-plus years later, but lets be honest – what was considered edgy forty years ago certainly isn’t what edgy is today.

Where there has been a diametrically important shift is that today parents are much more involved in what their kids are reading and watching and doing. I never had to wear a bicycle helmet and there weren’t little plastic covers on electrical sockets in my house when I was growing up. It was Darwinism pure and simple. Shift today’s parental attitudes and concerns to the 60s and a lot fewer kids would have been reading Marvel Comics because they were just way too edgy. That’s why we have a Marvel Adventures line, because we don’t want to fool ourselves into thinking that our books are suitable for 8 year-olds. Sure, some sophisticated 8 years-olds will dig them, but the Adventures line is created as much for the parents as it is for the kids.

So, if we begin from that point of view, there’s already a certain degree of gore and bloodshed in our regular Universe, much more than there was forty years ago and with respect to that, Marvel Zombies isn’t all that much different than our regular books.

Also, Marvel Zombies was rated Parental Advisory, Age 15 and up. This is the highest rating we give our books before heading into MAX world. It’s the same rating given to intense books like Moon Knight and Wolverine.

So, keeping all of that in mind, to me, it’s not a MAX title.

Did he even read the question? Or did he cut to the last sentence? The difference between Europe’s and America’s cultural differences has NOTHING TO DO WITH ANSWERING THE QUESTION. How things were in the ’60s shows how moral values change with the passing of each generation, but unless he’s willing to say that in another generation or two, there might be something worse in the MAX books and the Pulse will be considered tame, it doesn’t have much bearing on why brain eating is all audiences and standing next to a person who says ‘shit’ is not. The Marvel Adventures line? Great idea! NOT AT ALL INVOLVED IN THIS QUESTION.

It’s rather swell of Mr. Quesada to answer reader questions, but maybe they need to limit the questions or try an FAQ or just… get the man a calming cup of tea before hand. Because I’m not sure if this is working for public relations.

Medals for the War Effort

Civil War.

Like it, love it, hate it, want to send dirty socks to the Marvel editorial, we’ve called our troops home to… kind of hash out the same battle, just in a less mini-series-ish way and hopefully get thier hineys handed to them by the Hulk.  While Quesada might feel their mission is accomplished, the lasting ramifications are here to stay and while World War Hulk may just have Iron Man crunched like a tin can for his part in sending a friend and compatriot out into space, I’m getting that itchy feeling that it’s… probably not going to go the way I’d like to see it. With culpability and resolution and honesty. I mean, with a track record like Avengers: Disassembled (Wanda? Oh, she’s crazy and killed three members.), House of M (wherein the world was ONCE again changed by Wanda and she still gets to live scott free in eastern Europe with no resolution to her story or why some remember and some don’t or if Spider-Man and MJ remembers that Peter really wanted to be married to Gwen Stacy *deep breath*), the Other (no, really, what WAS all that??), how can I possibly believe at this point that no, I’m gonna kick that football into the stratosphere and Lucy is going to hold it still for me, this time for sure?

But, through it all, there were some brave and wonderful bloggers than came to the fore and provided review and humor in the face of adversity. Now that there’s some time to breathe, some time to heal and even more time to look ahead and worry, it’s nice to see that there are some who remember these are just the funny books. Marvel takes itself pretty seriously these days (they kill children, after all), but we don’t have to.

This post has been a long time in coming, but I would still like ot thank these brave soldiers who contributed to the War Effort:

MightyGodKing on livejournal has provided some wonderful re-writes of the entire Civil War, where in characters speak plainly, situations seem less you’ve-got-to-be-kidding ridiculous and more ha-ha ridiculous and the entire run of re-photoshopped work gave readers a little less seriousness and some pretty dead on commentary in public sentiment.
Of Course, Yeah and not because I took an awesome THIRD PLACE in his Draw Your Own contest.  Every humble little red strip was full of the snappy  behind the scenes sarcasm this series really deserved.  For every time you rolled your eyes and wondered if Bishop got a call the moment Tony found out Cable was on Cap’s side, or if it was just you that thought that Peter and Tony’s new father-son relationship was just a little too ‘special’, no you weren’t the only one.


Chris Sims started with a poem and ended on an epic in the classy style of one Rich Berlew. These mega events can be a lot to digest and someone who can get to the heart of the WTF?-ery and do it in a wittty fashion, at least for me, was a great relief.

Rokk’s Comic Book Revolution was indeed revolutionary as it was the first review of the final issue of Civil War that was positive towards the events and laid out a clear and concise manner for what he enjoyed and had unimaginable enthusiasm when I had lost mine. Sure, I might not agree with the guy on a few points, but I would be an idiot not to recognize the truth in his words. If this was the common perception of the book, I’d lay down arms. Sadly, not so many bloggers are as well thought out, even the other side of the equasion.

And last but not ever least, it took a little stuffed bull to get to the heart of the matter.

Thank you, one and all.

In Honor of Earth Day

Magneto reminds us that homo superior has no need for fossil fuels.  Or traffic congestion.

… or little traffic signs.

Drive green, folks.