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Shortcomings – Preview Review for 3/07

Wow.  Apparently, last week a good handful of people showed up to read my trouble with handing a kid an Iron Man comic.  Mind you, it's not going to be a problem what with the Marvel Adventures book coming out soon and the fact that the quality of the Marvel Adventures line is good enough for anyone off the street, I mostly just found it interesting to think that while Quesada is touting the change of status quo (ooh, that phrase is working on my nerves, but more on that later), some are looking exactly for that 'quo' in the first place.
Anyhoo, nothing as topical here, just some reviews of the preview books we got at work.   They didn't even give us anything juicy, like Mighty Avengers #1.  Let's get to it!

Bullet Points #5 (of 5)

This could have gone a lot longer.  JMS really loved his idea and it does show, no matter how much I may poke fun at the idea of putting Reed Richards in an eye patch.  He has a point to make, a very valid and very "Marvel" one at that: that one person can make a difference to change the whole world, for good or ill.  We humans are very powerful creatures no matter what radioactivity does, and that power comes from within.  Unfortunately, whether he just had an excess of ideas or just hadn't found that miracle pacing that would have highlighted his point better than the constant repetition of words and phrases and ideas (man, the first three books really hit you upside the head with that bullet metaphor).  This issue, we find out that despite the drastics changes to some heroes, others are perfectly fine: the X-Men are pretty standard, Clock and Dagger are around, Daredevil wasn't touched by the "Magic Bullet", even Doctor Doom still seems to be the Doom we all know and love even without the rivalry between himself and Mr. Fantastic.  We get a little montage of the rest of the heroes of the Marvel Universe because, as you may remember from last issues, Galactus is here.  All ABP is put out to everyone everywhere to stop the alien menace, everyone shows up, and everyone falls down.  Some die, but one lone figure continues his assault until the bitter end; Peter Parker Hulk goes down in a flurry of word repetition ("Absurd", "Pathetic", "Inevitable"), inspiring the Silver Surfer to turn against his master and too be blown to smithereens.  In the end, Galactus decides that eating Earth is just way too much work and the planet is saved.  At the very large funeral, we find ourselves face-to-face with the stirring speech I believe Straczynski wanted to tell us all along.

Ghost Rider: Trail of Tears #2

Did you see Ghost Rider?  Remember Sam Elliot's part?  This is like that only painted and rendered and written by Garth Ennis.  That same tone, that Sam Elliot feel of the lone cowboy and the big wide world that has such darkness in it is shown here and, for my part, I dig it.  Clayton Craine continues his quest for having the cover accurately portray the art inside, giving us great visuals that almost switch between a painted look and the crystal texture clarity that comes from a good CG art program.  Evil men come and hideously torture and murder a black family who has accomplished as much as any other white family in the area and the land is reclaimed by the former white owners and Travis Parham is the man to deliver vengeance.  Exposition is had and a very well timed horror pace is set.  Good gruff book.

Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #18

ATTENTION!  The recap page has spoilers for the next issue of Amazing Spider-Man, so if you want to wait out Aunt May's fate, don't read it.  Just know that the Sandman's dad stands accused of killing Uncle Ben which he didn't do because... well, Uncle Ben killed Uncle Ben.  CRISIS ON MULTIPLE UNCLE BENS!  Sandman and Peter Parker go to investigate all this in disguise, Peter using his holoemmitter to pretend to be Jamie Madrox.  The cops, being scum, go to far and Sandman obviously reacts to the idea of torturing his father for a admittance of guilt and the two have to flee.  In the meantime, Flash and Liz go on a date made more awkward by having a sudden attack of spiders when Liz goes to the ladies room.  She freaks and gets out, but all the manager finds when he goes in is the most blatant use of cocaine paraphernalia that would make the Comics Code Authority choke.  With a sneaky shot of "Ms. Arrow" doing everything but twirling a mustache, there's more wacky hijinks to come.  Sandman and Spidey go to the cemetery where Uncle Ben v.1 is buried (Flushing, NY apparently) and find a goth kid with Spider-Man 2211's helmet.  The helmet knows where an Uncle Ben, thus any answer for any of this madness still has at least another issue.

Marvel Zombies vs. Army of Darkness #1

What were you expecting, plot?  From Dynamite's John Layman and Fabiano Neves, Marvel takes a page from your own wandering thoughts and gives you the man from Army of Darkness versus their cavalcade of hero-cum-zombies.  A rather Ash-centric book, we follow his exploits as he gets randomly sent to the MU (well, not so random if you keep up with the Army of Darkness comics) in time to have the Avengers not take him seriously in the slightest, but fall to their own hubris as a big cloud with pink lightning brings about the zombie-ness.  This is the issue to set down the rules of the Army of Darkness movies, introduce the characters and let the real violence begin next issue.  Really, if you like either, this book is your bag.  If not, move along please.

newuniversal #4

Funny side note:  I tend to write and take notes in all caps, but I always make sure to use lowercase letters for newuniversal.  I repect the artist's vision.  And for my efforts, Warren Ellis continues to do what he enjoys as the man can talk alter reality the way some naturally learn a second language.  Reality shifts, paradigms, all of it sounds so new and wondrous when he talks about it, I just couldn't explain to you why.  Nor can I exactly 'recap' the storyline as we are still in the process of collecting our characters for the Big Show ahead.  There's some shades of the Authority in all of this, but considering I can cruise a lot of the New Universe titles out of the Quarter Bin, I think he's doing a fine job on bringing new life to the old source material.  It's full of plot points and setting info, easing you into this brave new world he's penning.  I'm such a sucker for sci-fi.

Onslaught Reborn #3 (of 5)

I also can't really recap this issue, but for entirely different reasons.  And I can evn find your a similar story in the quarter bin!  Man, there is something so old school about Onslaught Reborn, even dated further past the original Onslaught story, back to the days when Ghost Rider and Wolverine could totally rule on the Fantastic Four and Carnage was the bestest character ever because he could kill a lot of people.  In the third issue of Onslaught Reborn, people fight.  Thor fights Hulk, Hulk fights Thor, the Avengers fight Hulk and there's a not so subtle hint that Hawkeye is Wolverine.  Which... would be kind of unique considering the original Heroes Reborn universe left mutants out of the picture.  Huh.  In the end, the Fantastic Four seem to be very confused about the littlest Richards and Loki and his magical mystery crew show up to threaten that they'll be the ones to stop Onslaught as the Invisible Woman and a very gung-ho Ant Man swear to protect Franklin.

Squadron Supreme: Hyperion vs. Nighthawk #3 (of 4)

I have so many notes from WonderCon that I will be getting to, really.  One particular note that sticks out in my mind is how the idea of 'real world politics' would be integrated with the DC books.  Dan Didio said that it's a rough call:  if you have the real world event in comics, it makes your heroes look petty not to be involved and if you do involve them, it stops being a 'real world event' because just by having these superpowered characters involved, it becomes fantasy.  Not an exact quote, but a good gist especially after reading this book.  Now, the atrocities in Darfur should have the whole world watching, but when you put Mr. Hardcore Superman into the mix, it not oly makes the situation uncomfortable, but it makes him look less 'superhero-y' because they show very well that there is no clear way to end this conflict.   Nighthawk is responsible for dragging him around and getting him involved (also Nighthawk's able to predict his thoughts because he's so 'predictable'), but Hyperion reminds us that there are no heroes or easy solutions.  Depressing, but at least they have some African superheroes show up at the end of the book to bring back our fantasy of a better world.  I know, I know... better world in the Squadron Supreme universe is asking a little much, but what can I say?  I'm a dreamer.

Happy Wednesday, everybody!