snap judgments no, really, there are some comics you really should read

Short and Sweet – Reviews for 5/24

Shorter, snappier, wired on two iced mochas of the day, I bring to you... some of what Marvel and DC is a little too lazy to promote on their own.  I have to admit, doing these reviews is pretty helpful in regards to plying my craft of selling books to people who don't know what they want.  There's a lot of stuff I normally wouldn't read, but stuff that other people ... might. If that makes any sense.  And when someone comes into the store and says 'So, what's this DMZ thing?' and other register jockeys start to get that glaze in their eyes, I can a little spotlight as I scribble down notes for them to read to the customer.

Just 12, since I was turned on and tuned out to a new manga title on the shelves thanks to a rather awesome writer who happened upon my humble store.  It's called Death Note and once you get past the character who looks like a reject from KISS then you find yourself in a artful crime drama that far too smart for it's own good.

Daredevil #85

You know you've hit a rough spot when the Punisher is giving you morality advice in prison.  Ed Brubaker hasn't missed a step in Bendis's party line and I'd even say one upped the man as far as killer drama.  After all, who wouldn't want to watch a shark tank?  With the Punisher, Daredevil and the Kingpin all swimming about, you're on the edge of your seat for first blood and even though we never get that blood, there's enough characterization and story development to explain why.  Daredevil isn't Punisher, and with all the hardcore prison tough guy routine it's nice to know that they haven't forgotten that.   Next issue, prison riot!

Exiles #84

It's the Heroes Reborn universe!  The miniseries version to boot!  Oh... boy?  Morph-Proteus shows up to do the obvious 'convince clueless heroes he's the good guy before the other guys show up' shtick, the saps being the Young Allies, the group with the girl Bucky.  The Exiles show up, lather, rinse repeat, then 'O' and 'K' (manifestations of Order and Chaos wikipedia tells me) pick up Proteus for an end of the world kind of thing.  Could this mean the end of Proteus?  Can we dream?  This is a great concept book but the recent line has really started to stall with an overdone storyline.  Or maybe I'm just smarting since they lost Morph.

Fantastic Four: A Death in the Family

Okay, I don't say this very much unless it's absolutely true, but for this one-shot, it's entirely deserved:  Don't buy this book.  Really.  There is nothing to see here and the fact they want $3.99 for it is rather depressing.  It's a short story about Johnny Storm inadvertently causing a monster to show up who's energy blast can't be deflected by Sue's invisible shielding so she dies.  Reed (who last went a little around the bend when Ben kicked the bucket when Waid was writing) is pretty much hopeless as he holds the dead body of his wife so Johnny goes back in time and stops the monster.  Apparently, this is a futile gesture as it saved another reality's Sue and not the Sue that died in Time Traveling Johnny's universe, but Ben says that he did it to prevent them from going through the same heartache as his universe and then it's group hug time!  This is like 6 pages.  The rest of the book is a reprint of FF #245, a Official Handbook entry and a Franklin Richards, Son of a Genius reprint, 'Now You See Me'.  I don't know why they bothered.

Iron Man #8

Iron Man continues to do hellacious damage to guys listed on a mysterious laptop screen as Tony does hellacious damage to his reputation on the (new) Avengers.  Iron Man is on the scene for a breakout attempt handled with excessive force, definitely showing up the rest of his team in the same amp'd up manner of last issue.  When Captain America tries to get him to stand down, Iron Man attacks Cap.  When they call him on being late, Tony couldn't give a damn which Spider-Woman is left to sort of deal with.  Which she does by giving Tony the benefit of the doubt.  I guess people are more willing to believe the Avengers's Clock is off than that the guy who nearly choked out Captain FREAKIN' America and was a pheromone away from throwing down with Wolverine might have been late.  Total alcoholic behavior, getting belligerent and blaming other's vehemently for your own bad behavior, which means that when a team guest stars in a title character's book, they lose all credibility.  As long as you don't think about the Civil War tie in potential, it's actually interesting to watch Iron Man's descent into addiction to the new power of the Extremis virus... if that's what this is.

New Excalibur #7

Black Tom Cassidy loses his mutant powers thanks to Wanda/'M-Day'/whatever they want to call it nowadays and is back to being human instead of a man-plant monster.  What does he do?  He goes out and at great expense recreates his powers mechanically.  Because robotic 'plant' tentacles can't be cheap.  Oh, and he wants to defeat the new Excalibur.  Most likely because they were there.  Juggernaut confronts him on the death of his precious Sammy the Fish-Boy and talks at him a bunch, causing Tom to give up.  And Dazzler dies and comes back, Tessa 'defeats' the Evil Charles Xavier from Another Dimension and the team flounders on.  With Sean Cassidy gone (thanks a lot Deadly Genesis), there's some great potential for the Black Sheep of the Cassidy clan.  Uhm, maybe that'll be in next issue.  Or something.

Sensational Spider-Man #26

I love Clayton Craine.  His run with Garth Ennis in the last Ghost Rider mini-series was off the charts awesome.  I'm not a big Ghost Rider fan but the detail and visuals were just great.  He does this issue of Sensational Spider-Man and can certainly do some big monster battles.  Spider-Man visits Madame Web, Reed Richards theorizes and Puma shares with the Black Cat pretty much the same info:  that there is some sort of radiation being emitted that is causing all the 'animal' themed villains and heroes to go feral.  Spider-Man isn't as effected because he is, and I quote: 'so decent'.  And he's honestly been turned into a human spider way too much in recent months.  He goes under cryptic orders to Central Park, talks up his new super suit when coming in between the Lizard and Vermin, and learns that Dr. Vincent Stegron is behind this whole thing! Or... at least behind a bunch of Lizardy-henchpersons.

Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane #6

Don't you think the title should be the other way around?  After all, MJ really shines in the book.  Anyhoo, Mary Jane is caught up in liking Peter who may or may not be totally into the new girl and is wonderfully high school girl about it to make Liz ask why.  Cue flashback where MJ is dumped by Ned Leeds for 'Betty' (ah, name dropping!  like Scooby Snacks for the uber-nerd) and in response to her heartache... goes goth with new friend, 'Jessica'.   Read into that what you will.  In the end, it's this new Spider-Man guy's 'Shaa, whatever' attitude that's got her smiling.  I love this book.

X-Factor #7

HA!  Scott Summers, bless his heart, comes to the X-Factor detective agency to tell ailing Siryn her father 'died in action'.  Her response?  A shrug and 'He'll be back'.  Leave it to Peter David to put to paper what we've all thought for years.  One half of the X-Men are always mourning the loss of the other half, so let's get some chow.  Wow.  Mind you, the skeptic in me says that this reaction only means they killed the guy for good, but I'm gonna keep my fingers crossed.  Guido mistakes the death of Sean Cassidy for the death of Shaun Cassidy, which is the kind of joke you know is going to be lost on half the audience and is kind of sour.  And the standoff between Tryp and X-Factor continues to follow very Angel-esque guidelines.  Do note Scott asking what Layla's doing there, harkening back to House of M.

American Way #4

Racism is an ugly thing and really hard not to write without going cliché.  Having a racist character named 'Burning Cross' for example.  Poor, poor stereotyped Southern people.  In the wake of the Cuban Missile Crisis, someone is an idiot and lets an actual psychotic murderer loose to kill Cuban delegates. The government wants it done covertly too, and for this psycho 'Hellbent' guy to fall to their fake hero team as well.  This should not only get rid of the communist delegates, but make the CDC look good since it's been found out they have an African American hero on the team.  Unsurprisingly, Hellbent does none of this and slaughters a bus full of innocent black protesters and, well, most of the CDC.  The story continues to bring me down as far as message and cliché go, but I'll still leave some hope that there's going to be hope.  Remember when heroes were heroic?

Hellblazer #220

The noose continues to tighten around John Constantine's neck and we continue to wait because this is when he does his best work.  The secret and most likely evil religious sect that's lured John to Scotland and wants him dead is going to power an engine of some sort that will flood the world with empathy and make the keeper of Limbo very unhappy.  Decisions are made, some of them bad, and the story rolls along smoothly.

JSA Classified #12

There's a One Year Later stamp on the cover, but can they do that for an anthology book?  I guess so as a few things are let slip throughout the story, such as 'the JSA's not... totally together at the moment'.  Not to mention the idea that you really shouldn't mess with Vandal Savage, even when you think he's dying and certifiably crazy.  Alan Scott and the Sandman go to look into Mr. Savage, mad, vengeful and dying, only for Alan to be trapped and confronted about his parenting skills.  It's a so-so conversation, but the intent is there.  Because if Vandal Savage goes, he's taking Alan Scott with him.

Skye Runner #2

Remember Battle Chasers?  Man, that was a good looking book.  There was the girl with the big gloves, a big metal guy, and old guy, a hero with a sword and oh!  The chick with the HUGE boobs.  It was a pretty book, back in the Joe Madureira heyday and certainly sold right off the shelf, but does anyone remember it was supposed to be about?  I can think of a few character points and a couple hooks, but what was the overarching story?  Nope, not coming to me.  Welcome to Skye Runner.  Enjoy it for the art, the neat little nuances but leave the plotline to long forgotten memory.  There's an underwater fight in this issue and a J. Scott Campbell cover.

Happy Wednesday, folks.